my mama

hiking with Oni

My mama, aka. Gramma Oni, is visiting this week. We found a beautiful hike in the Golden Gate Canyon Park just above Golden, called Wrangler's Run loop.
Bodhi particularly enjoyed controlling the pace of the trek, or at least battling for control with his grandmother.Then there was the unexpected highlight of finding several four-leaf promises near a babbling creek, in which Bodhi splashed and frolicked alongside an array of four legged counterparts.As a grand finale the trail made a surprise ascent up a long steep section peppered with erosion blocks. The result was a nearly impossible attempt to push the stroller straight up. In the end we tethered mom to the front with two leashes and I pushed from the rear, yelling "HAW old woman, HAW", doubled over with laughter and crying from glee.
A good day.

Sometimes I feel like a spiny succulent with all my juicy moistness encased in an armor of prickles and barbs. Agave's are incredibly hearty, capable of handling a wide array of climate changes, all the result of their particular botanical evolution. The truth is, I find them startlingly and deeply beautiful and although I long to be soft and willowy, perhaps a part of each of us needs to find kinship with a cactus.

trip to the zoo

Bodhi loves the animals at the zoo. This morning he woke up and announced, "Mama, let's go see the animals!". Of course!
We packed a light picnic and headed out. When visiting the zoo it is best to see it at Bodhi's pace, without an agenda or some frenzied determination to see as many animals as possible. Today, Bodhi looked at the map, found the picture of his beloved elephants and said, pointing, "Let's go there". And so we did. This time we were treated to a visual explanation of the term "I have to pee like an elephant". Something Owen and Shane began saying a few years ago after a similar experience with our pachyderm brethren.Next we visited the penguins, the mandrils and the flamingos. At the flamingo exhibit Bodhi immediatly attempted a break in. When stopped, he stared in disillusionment at his pink friends, stating simply, "I want to be a flamingo too".As we were getting ready to leave, we discovered a kindred spirit. This beautiful black and white youngster from Africa.I must clarify a point. Bodhi doesn't have favorite animals in general, rather he has good friends that are animals in specific. The main point of attraction is personality, something Bodhi has in spades and thus admires in others. This little friend played with Bodhi for forty minutes, hanging in front of the glass pressing a hand toward Bodhi's, licking the glass where his face was. It was beautiful. In a short time Bodhi was looking for a way in. I love this simple difference between the innocence of childhood and the occasional stagnancy of adulthood. Bodhi doesn't see the bars, fences and cages as a measure of protection for him or the animals. He sees them as a barrier, something he naturally wants to overcome. He longs for freedom and the liberty to call a friend a friend, regardless of rank or species. I too have often wondered what we are walling in and what we are walling out, when we create bars and prisons, zoos and barriers. In the end Bodhi simply held out a hand and said, "Friend!" a simple gesture that was as simply returned. One of my greatest hopes is that he manages to hold fast to that innocence his whole life long.

a few more pictures from the road

Really!!!!????? I wonder if they're mass produced in China or something.

Wow!!!! Bodhi and I explored the Colorado dunes for the first time and there are no words sufficient to describe the magnitude of such natural beauty or the fun of exploring it.

taos, new mexico

San Francisco de Asis Church in Ranchos de Taos, every angle presents beauty against the brilliant blue of a New Mexican sky.Taking to the road with an unpredictable two year old, changes the way you see the world and also how you interact with it. As many of you know, I love holy sites of all faiths. I like to close my eyes and sit, quietly breathing in the reverence afforded such places by those who worship there. Bodhi approaches things differently. The statue of St. Francis seemed like a fabulous play patner and in no time Bodhi was walking around him chanting, "ring around the rosies".A fact that led to a number of scowling visitors, but no doubt pleased the holy of holies. Next, we entered the church where Bodhi immediately saw the holy water. I showed him what it was for, dabbing my fingers on my forehead, chest and both shoulders. Bodhi, looked at me with a sort of pity and showed me what water is for, drinking. Next, we attempted to approach the alter to light two purchased candles, one for my beautiful catholic Grande' Cia and one as a prayer for clarity. I tried to explain this to Bodhi and he announced, "Yeah I know what the candles are for, I've been here before in California, except there were a lot more flowers". Then he approached the candles and began a throaty rendition of "Happy Birthday to You", I stopped him before he began surreptitiously blowing out candle-prayers. The poor penitents in the church were no doubt casting disapproving looks at me, his mother. Once the candles were lit and prayers speedily whispered Bodhi looked around and said, "I don't like this place" and ran singing to the door and out into the open arms of a wide sky, beneath whose gaze even the bawdiest songs are welcome.

sailing

Occasionally when I am having difficulty with the foggy human-ness of life and can't see the rocks well enough to navigate safely to shore, the sailor in my heart turns the ship to the open sea. The wind rushes at my face reminding me to breathe, the salty spray mingles with my tears and I remember to look up and out, at the beauty that cradles my imagined smallness. For an instant, I grow wings and the world smiles with abandon through my eyes. For an instant I am not Angelina, beset with emotions and a tangle of thoughts, desires and limitations, instead, I am the wild dance of life breathing life and all the space in between. In that moment I am home. My beautiful younger brother and kindred soul, Danny, once described this as being a sailor. A 'sailor' is something bigger than someone who sets out on a literal boat, it is a way of inhabiting the shifting sea of life while embracing a horizon wide with possibility. I like that. The next few posts are devoted to the sights along the way.

I love hands. They say so much about a person and a life. Here are three photos of some of my favorite hands(my father's and my sons'), seeing them causes my heart to expand with a deep awe-inspired breath of life....

a day in the sun

two and a half

Happy half birthday to our Bodhi-boy. I had no idea that any single person could be so full of joy, life and energy! WHEW~ He had such fun making his requested pink half cake and then to add to the fun he had a special date with Baba and Mojo! Now if you ask him how old he is, he will proudly announce, "My body, two and half years old".